This weekend, both my daughter and son decided that they wanted to run with me. So I put together a miniature version of a good overall workout that I do on occasion. Same warm up, drills, stretches, main set, and cool down, just shorter distances. Admittedly, I was concerned about my daughter joining us. There's often sibling rivalry at play. The bigger issue is that she often thinks something sounds good and healthy so she wants to do it... until she actually gets into it.
This was the case today. That beautiful daughter of mine was already huffing and puffing hard during the warm up despite my efforts to get her to take it easier. We weren't out of the parking lot before she started complaining about a bruise that she "forgot" she had. Less than a 1/4 of the way into the 1 mile run, she was ready to be done and started complaining, fake crying, and breathing as shallow as she could. Her exaggeration of all of it made me think that she'd be a good professional soccer player.
I wouldn't let her stop.
She didn't like that.
Rather than argue with her, I started asking her about what she was excited about for the upcoming school year. We talked about books that she enjoyed and the next ones that she wanted to read. Before you know it, we were at the halfway point where I let her take a breather before we headed back. Just a few steps after that break, she started right back into the exaggerated excuses that she couldn't go on. I tried to keep her talking, but it wasn't as easy now.
I told her that I wasn't going to let her quit. At one point, I was even pushing her with a hand to keep her moving forward and tried to get her focused on the finish line. We made it to the end. Both legs were still attached and she was just fine.
Afterward, we unpacked what had taken place. I explained to her about the improvements in performance she would get by running through the point of being a little uncomfortable. We talked about how running can make other things that she enjoys, like dance, better because of her fitness level. We also talked through how important persevering is in school and in life.
Romans 5:3-5
3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
Just like us, kids don't want to be uncomfortable. As Christians and parents, it's our job to teach them that when we work through struggles, we're growing. Sometimes, being uncomfortable is the intentionality with which we work on some aspect of our lives, like training to stay fit or going for the smoothie when you'd really like a doughnut. Other times, it's the way we work through circumstances and hardships.
Regardless of why we're uncomfortable, it's important to teach our children that we really do grow stronger when persevere through it. The part that's tough for every parent is allowing your children to be uncomfortable without letting them give up. Our nature is to swoop in and make it all better. However, it's more loving to allow them to grow stronger and more mature. We need to let them know that we're still right there with them, but we're not going to let them give up when things get uncomfortable.
The generation of kids growing up now is so used to immediate gratification and the "everyone gets a medal for showing up" mentality that perseverance is falling to the wayside. On the other hand, life as a Christian is getting more uncomfortable as our beliefs fall under greater attack. As we train our children and show them what it means to be a grown up, are we teaching them to seek comfort or to persevere?
As the absolute truth of Scripture falls under fire more and more, it is critical that we have perseverance to stand by the truth in spite of what the world says and does. For the child who grew up knowing little else but comfort, they'll conform. The child that was allowed to grow through the struggles will have the perseverance it takes to stand firm under fire.
